Volume One, Chapter 15: Unable to Control One's Own Heart

Mei Gongxue’s brow furrowed ever so slightly, barely noticeable, and she quickly stepped back. Yet, faced with Ji Yunchu’s request, she found herself somewhat reluctant to refuse.

Ji Yunchu seemed to have seen through her thoughts and took the initiative to jump onto the carriage and climb inside. After a while, seeing that Mei Gongxue remained motionless, he lifted a corner of the curtain and said, “It’s so cold outside, why don’t you hurry up and get in?”

Mei Gongxue pressed her lips together and had no choice but to climb aboard.

Inside the carriage, it was very quiet, with only the rolling sound of the wheels. Mei Gongxue kept her brow tightly knit, as if lost in deep thought, staring blankly ahead.

Ji Yunchu glanced at her and couldn’t help but repeat his earlier question, “Has something happened? Do you need my help?”

Whether or not he could actually intervene, at least he could listen to her troubles. He remembered when he first moved into the Marquis’s residence, his martial arts skills were poor and he couldn’t keep up with the other young masters, which often left him feeling down. It was Mei Gongxue, back then a child herself, who encouraged him, saying that flowers bloom again, youth is a second chance, and anything could be started anew.

“No, it’s nothing,” Mei Gongxue replied lightly, then fell silent.

Ji Yunchu persisted, “Did you hear some gossip at the Ministry of Justice? Don’t take it to heart. And don’t worry about being sent back to prison—after all, it was His Majesty who pardoned you!”

Mei Gongxue only nodded, her words drying up completely this time.

She clearly seemed unwilling to have any further connection with him.

Ji Yunchu felt a bit awkward, but his gaze suddenly fell on the hairpin nestled in her hair. “You’re still wearing that pin? It really is beautiful.”

Mei Gongxue instinctively reached up to touch it—it was the peach blossom hairpin she had worn at her coming-of-age ceremony.

“Thank you,” she said, her tone notably softer, perhaps because it reminded her of her father.

Ji Yunchu’s eyes darkened with a hint of wistfulness. Suddenly, he said, “I even painted a picture for you back then!”

“Really?” Mei Gongxue didn’t pay much attention. She was more curious about why Ji Yunchu had appeared beside her carriage—it didn’t seem accidental. Was he deliberately waiting for her?

A wave of emotion swept through her: if only three years ago he had been like this, speaking up for her, maybe she wouldn’t have felt so isolated and helpless. Or if, during her ordeal at the Zhao residence, he had found a way to send her a message to ask if she was alright, things might have unfolded differently.

But there were no “ifs.” She no longer needed such concern.

Ji Yunchu finally fell silent, seemingly unaccustomed to this new, closed-off Mei Gongxue. Previously, no matter her mood, it was always written plainly on her face.

Now, it was as if she had wrapped herself in a shell, rejecting anyone’s kindness or closeness, making it impossible to discern what she truly felt.

Suddenly, the carriage jolted violently.

Mei Gongxue, already distracted, failed to sit steady and nearly collided with the carriage wall.

Fortunately, Ji Yunchu reached out in time to steady her.

His palm was warm and broad, the heat almost searing.

Mei Gongxue quickly withdrew her hand, her heart pounding fiercely, her cheeks flushing with warmth.

Afraid of being noticed, she immediately turned her head away.

But in the next instant, she was filled with self-reproach and wanted to slap herself.

What was she thinking? At this point, still feeling fluttering emotions for someone impossible—wasn’t that embarrassing?

How pathetic!

Ji Yunchu was about to marry Mei Xianghan soon. Why was she still entangled with him?

She mustn’t let herself fall to such a pitiable state.

She disliked this side of herself, hated that she couldn’t control her own heart.

After letting a cold breeze blow through the gap by the window for a while, Mei Gongxue finally sat upright, her expression cold and detached.

Ji Yunchu looked at her like this and felt as if she wanted to sever ties with everything around her, which left him powerless and vaguely uneasy.

After a moment, he handed over the gift box he had been holding. “My sister-in-law’s health hasn’t been good lately. I specially brought some warming and nourishing medicines. They’re gentle and very suitable for her.”

Mei Gongxue quickly took it. “Thank you.”

So this was the real reason he came to see her today.

“These herbs are precious and cost me quite a bit,” Ji Yunchu suddenly said with a serious expression.

Mei Gongxue was taken aback and was about to ask him for the exact amount. Although she had no money, she could always ask the Marquis’s household for it.

But Ji Yunchu beat her to it. “Actually, I’m not that concerned about the money. It’s just that I haven’t heard you play the qin for a long time. The last piece, ‘Melody of the Orchid,’ was quite good!”

Mei Gongxue was stunned again. Something about this felt strange.

A mischievous glint appeared in Ji Yunchu’s eyes.

Mei Gongxue was so eager to keep their relationship distant, wasn’t she? Fine, he would approach it politely then.

These medicines were expensive, but they were a personal favor. Asking her to play a piece for him wasn’t too much to ask.

Sure enough, after hesitating for a moment, Mei Gongxue nodded.

They fell silent again, but Ji Yunchu’s mood brightened considerably.

When they arrived, he said no more and got off the carriage directly.

Mei Gongxue let out a slight sigh of relief, but moments later, the carriage curtain suddenly whipped open again.

Ji Yunchu pointed toward his residence gate. “I live here now.”

He feared she wouldn’t know where he lived and might not find him if she needed to.

“That’s nice,” Mei Gongxue nodded.

The mansion’s gate was magnificent, exquisitely carved—indeed quite impressive.

Only then did Ji Yunchu feel assured enough to leave.

The carriage traveled a while longer before returning to the Marquis’s residence.

Mei Gongxue intended to visit her sister-in-law first but, upon entering, unexpectedly ran into the one person she least wished to see.

“Sister, are you alright?” Mei Xianghan’s voice was thick with concern.

Mei Gongxue frowned.

For some reason, when Mei Xianghan used this term before, it sounded sweet and endearing, but now it felt cloying and overly affected.

Supported by a maid, Mei Xianghan came forward and scrutinized Mei Gongxue for a moment. Her watery eyes immediately welled with tears.

“I thought those people at the Ministry of Justice would trouble you. I’m relieved you’re fine! It’s all my fault for having a high fever this morning, which delayed my brother, so you had to go to such a place alone. Sister, do you blame me?”

Mei Gongxue really didn’t know what to say.

She understood Mei Xianghan didn’t mean to boast, but hearing those words still stung.

Perhaps because truth often wounds.

“I’m fine. They only asked me a couple of questions. You’d better go back to your room,” Mei Gongxue said stiffly.

Mei Xianghan’s face brightened, thinking Mei Gongxue was expressing concern.

But in truth, Mei Gongxue simply didn’t want her to be blamed again for worsening her illness.

Thus, the two of them walked inside together.

Suddenly, the coachman called from behind, “Miss, you forgot the gift that Young Master Yunchu gave you!”

At once, Mei Xianghan’s expression changed.

Could it be that Mei Gongxue had met Ji Yunchu earlier? Was it a chance encounter or a deliberate meeting?