Chapter 8: Burning with Jealousy, Unable to Find Joy

A strange encounter with the zither in the dead of night gradually soothed Han Chu’s troubled heart, to the point that even what she had witnessed earlier in Cha Cha’s courtyard seemed easier to accept. She could not tell whether it was the lingering effect of the music or the influence of the white-robed gentleman.

With such faint uncertainties in her mind, Han Chu returned to her quarters and at last fell into a restful sleep. The next morning, as she woke and finished washing up, she caught sight of a figure in lake-blue standing in her courtyard. Shen Yu stood with his hands clasped behind his back, his profile turned toward the gate, lost in thought.

In truth, Shen Yu was strikingly handsome, his profile especially so—distinct and well-chiseled. At this moment, silent and still, he shed his usual irreverence, taking on a quality that could set any young maiden’s heart fluttering.

But Han Chu was no longer a girl in the throes of first love.

She suddenly found herself at a loss for how to face Shen Yu. Fortunately, her current loss of voice had become something of an advantage.

As she was quietly grateful for this, Shen Yu noticed her and, without expression, turned his head to ask, “Did you sleep well last night?”

Han Chu had no choice but to step over the threshold, bow respectfully toward Shen Yu in the courtyard, and nod gently.

“But I didn’t sleep well,” Shen Yu said, his gaze burning into her, unwilling to miss the slightest change in her expression.

Han Chu deliberately avoided his eyes, letting her gaze rest on the parasol tree in the courtyard, smiling faintly without replying.

Seeing her so detached, Shen Yu felt both frustrated and disappointed. Her flustered retreat last night, her avoidance—all seemed the jealous antics of a young woman. But at the time, surprised and embarrassed himself, he had not noticed the peculiarity.

In truth, after Han Chu left, he had tried to continue his dalliance with Cha Cha, but his heart was not in it; he could not muster the slightest interest and eventually abandoned the attempt.

Waking in the middle of the night, he looked at Cha Cha beside him, but his mind was filled only with images of Han Chu—her former shyness, panic, anger, even her indifference, all clear as day.

He found himself preoccupied with her, and so, ignoring the soft warmth at his side, he rose and went to her courtyard. Yet this heartless girl slept soundly, showing not the least sign of sadness or loss.

How vastly different from the time Han Chu had been heartbroken upon hearing of Helian Qi’s marriage!

The more Shen Yu thought about it, the more vexed he became. He returned to Cha Cha’s bed, had to explain away his absence, and after finally coaxing her back to sleep, found he could not close his eyes for the rest of the night.

Now, having come early in the morning to see her again, all he received was her indifferent smile. That was all.

“Why did you go to Cha Cha last night?” Shen Yu pressed, still hoping she might care for him.

At this, Han Chu pointed to her earlobe, then turned inside and fetched an earring.

Shen Yu recognized the earring vaguely, but he had given so many gifts to women that he could not recall them all. One glance at the camellia-shaped earring and he understood.

So, she had gone to Cha Cha to return the earring.

Disappointment deepened on Shen Yu’s face. He fell silent for a moment, then finally sighed and began, “Last night, I…”

But just then, a coquettish voice interrupted, “Young Marquis!” Cha Cha came into the courtyard, holding a thin cloak. “The morning air is damp. Why aren’t you wearing something over your shoulders?”

She draped the cloak over Shen Yu, then smiled at Han Chu, “Sister, you’re up early.”

Han Chu simply handed the earring to Cha Cha, giving her a blank look.

“So it was here!” Cha Cha feigned surprise. “I searched for it for hours yesterday—all through the Western Garden. So it was left with you, little sister.”

She cast a shy glance at Shen Yu, then continued to Han Chu, “You don’t know, but that was a birthday gift from the Young Marquis last year. If I had lost it, I wouldn’t know what to do!”

As she spoke, she took Han Chu’s hands in hers, as if to express her gratitude. Han Chu allowed her to hold them, feeling the cold at her fingertips, answering Cha Cha’s petty schemes with silence.

Cha Cha, realizing Han Chu’s intent, forced a laugh and released her hands. “I won’t keep you and the Young Marquis from talking. I’ll take my leave.”

But Han Chu gestured that she wished to speak to Cha Cha privately.

Seeing this, Shen Yu frowned. “What do you have to say that you can’t say in front of me?”

Han Chu pressed her lips together and looked down, showing her determination.

“Your voice isn’t back yet. What could you possibly say?” Shen Yu grew more displeased; she would rather speak with Cha Cha than be alone with him. What could she have to say behind his back? And she’d lost her voice—clearly just an excuse to avoid him, and a poor one at that.

Cha Cha saw through his thoughts. With a flick of her hair and a flutter of her lashes, she smiled at him, “Women always have their private matters. Do you really want to listen in?”

With Cha Cha thus “rescuing” her, Shen Yu could not press further. He glanced at Han Chu, saw her still cold and indifferent, and was instantly annoyed.

He deliberately straightened the hairpin at Cha Cha’s temple, then said with a cold laugh, “If only Han Chu were half as sensible as you!” With that, he swept his sleeves and left the courtyard.

As soon as he was gone, Cha Cha’s coy smile vanished, replaced by a look of smugness. “So, what do you want to say to me in private?”

Han Chu merely glanced at her, her eyes tinged with pity.

Feeling a chill, Cha Cha grew angry. “You think I’m pitiful?”

Han Chu’s expression did not change; she did not deny it.

“The Young Marquis trusts me and has put me in charge of Chasing Rainbow Pavilion. What do I have to pity? If anyone’s pitiful, it’s you—mute, and now cold-shouldered by the Young Marquis.”

Han Chu pressed her lips together; though silent, she was not in the least cowed.

Seeing this, Cha Cha was not only angry but jealous. Only she knew what had happened after Han Chu left last night—how Shen Yu, usually so passionate and eager, had been utterly indifferent to her advances, responding only perfunctorily and finally coaxing her to sleep with soft words.

For someone who prided herself on her charms in the bedchamber, it was a first taste of humiliation. Yes—Shen Yu did not want her.

The more Cha Cha dwelled on it, the more jealous she became, yet she forced herself to smile, leaning close to Han Chu’s ear and whispering, “Do you know why the Young Marquis likes me to serve him?”

Han Chu’s gaze turned cold, unmoved.

Cha Cha tittered, then explained in a sultry voice, “He likes to hear a woman cry out—talking, moaning, gasping…the more wanton, the better. You must have heard last night. Did I sound happy enough?”

At these crude, obscene words, Han Chu finally felt a wave of nausea; she stepped back, putting distance between herself and Cha Cha.

“You’re disgusted? Why should you be? Didn’t you serve Helian Qi well enough? Or did you fail to please him, and that’s why he cast you aside?”

Cha Cha gripped Han Chu’s arm tightly, forcing her to listen. “What will you do? You’re mute! If you can’t cry out in bed, the Young Marquis will soon find you dull!”

As she spoke, she squeezed Han Chu’s arm, mocking, “We both come from the dust. Why pretend to be so pure and virtuous?”

Such words of humiliation Han Chu had only ever heard from Ming Ying before—but Ming Ying was Helian Qi’s wife and the daughter of a noble house. She had swallowed it. But coming from Cha Cha, Han Chu saw no reason to endure it.

With that thought, she wrenched herself free, her clear eyes flashing with shame and anger. Yet even in humiliation, there was an inexpressible allure about her, like the most radiant flower in a garden—dangerous, but impossible not to pick.

Even Cha Cha had to admit Han Chu was stunning, worthy of her title as the greatest beauty of Nanxi.

Truth be told, Cha Cha did not dislike Han Chu, but she envied her beauty. Were it not for that, she would not be so hostile.

By now, Han Chu was trembling with fury, her chest heaving. She pointed silently at the gate, dismissing Cha Cha, struggling to maintain her composure.

Noting her restraint, Cha Cha sneered, “No need to see me out; I’m leaving.”

She walked to the gate, then turned back, “Don’t say I didn’t warn you. If you want to stay peacefully in Chasing Rainbow Pavilion, you’d best learn your place. Look at the other two in the Western Garden—they never try to outshine me.”

With a hard, defiant smile, she stepped gracefully across the threshold and left.

*****

Meanwhile, Shen Yu, fuming with anger and torn between love and resentment for Han Chu, could not help but worry about her throat ailment. He hurried to the Eastern Garden, determined to continue seeking a cure.

“Where is your master?” Shen Yu asked, spotting a familiar steward—one brought by a friend—upon entering.

“My master is in the study, reviewing medical texts,” the steward replied respectfully.

Shen Yu made to leave, but the steward hesitated, then said, “I have a small favor to ask, Young Marquis. I hope you will help.”

“Oh? There’s something your master cannot manage, and must ask me for?” Shen Yu arched a brow in amusement.

“It’s not my master’s wish, but my own,” the steward admitted. “I wish to find a suitable maid to serve my master. I hope you can help me choose one.”